thinking a lot today about the gross sexualization of queer people and lesbians in particular.
two girls were dumped in an extremely unsafe location on the side of the interstate at night by a cab driver who was offended by the fact that they were gay and they kissed a couple of times. They also had a friend in the back seat with them.
here are some choice excerpts from the comments:
“In fact, depending upon the action, I’d wager most cab driver would gladly drive them to their destination but very slowly — “Sorry ladies, there’s an accident on the freeway ahead. We’ll have to take the much slower surface streets… and don’t mind this camera.”
The only thing that might make this situation better is if they were wearing loose clothing and a cat fight broke out too.”
"There is likely more to the story than just a kiss or two. I can only imagine the tawdry scene that the poor cab driver was subjected to when he looked in his rear view mirror. Now the guy is being villanized because two sexually confused individuals were likely engaged in extremely erotic behavior. "
and obviously, the list goes on. i wish people could live their lives without everything little thing becoming part of some old white dude’s fucked up porn fantasy.
"I was holding her hand and we kissed a couple of times in the back seat, minding our own business,” Shanako Devoll said. "He made homophobic remarks that were very hurtful to us. We did not want to be in his cab.”
also, the commenters on this article are literally the worst.
Hey Portland folks! My name’s Sarah and I’m a 23 year old queer lady currently living in Seattle. After living several places in the past few years (California, Massachusetts and Washington) I’ve decided to make the move back to Portland which is where I grew up. I’ve yet to find a place that I love more.
When I move back I will be working as a barista (what I’ve been doing for the past couple years since I graduated from college) and working on starting an antiques business with my mom. I like vintage things, old buildings and houses, trips to the coast and going on hikes. I used to surf and snowboard when I was growing up in Oregon but haven’t gone in a long time. I’m hoping to get back into it! I like to make things and I’m trying to learn more craft and woodworking skills and hoping to put them to good use with various projects.
I’m moving back to the city in August and I am not in need of immediate housing/roommate. I would love to be able to find a roommate and an apartment or house by September, October or November, depending on what’s for rent out there. If you are not also looking for an immediate roommate situation, this might be great so we can take some time to get to know each other.
What I’m looking for in a housing situation:
- 2 bedroom apartment or house
- My budget is $800/month possibly more if I get a second job.
- Preferably somewhere in inner SE in the Belmont/Hawthorne/Laurelhurst area. Possibly NW or some parts of SW, although I’ve found those areas to be more expensive.
- An older apartment/house. I like places with character and charm. Do you like built-in cabinets and wood floors? Me too! I’m willing to pay more to not live in a 1960’s box.
Things I’m looking for in a roommate:
- I’m queer, but you don’t need to be as long as you are queer friendly.
- Ideally, I’m looking for just one roommate who is interested in settling down in a place and not in a super transitional place in their lives.
- Someone who respects personal space. I’m totally okay with having people over, but I’m not one for hosting parties in my own home. I also love hanging out with my roommate, but also enjoy lots of personal time. Like to spend a few hours every day reading in your room or doing art projects? Great! So do I.
- Somewhat tidy - Sometimes I can be a bit cluttered, and it’s okay if you are too. I just appreciate someone who can clean up their own messes or who have no problem helping clean communal areas from time to time.
- Someone who has similar taste in decorating as I do. This sounds weird and picky, but I’m working on an antique/interior design business, so I do a TON of decorating because my apartment is usually where I show things off. Want to know what I like? Check out my tumblr or my instagram for pics of my current apartment.
- Someone who is totally OK with the fact that I am not vegan or vegetarian. I like to prepare most of my meals myself but am totally down to make meals together sometimes!
There’s a few other things obviously, but if I sound like a good match so far, please feel free to contact me and we can chat more about what we’re looking for!
Me: Okay so if orientation is a choice, choose to be gay, right now.
Me: Why not?
Him: Because I don’t find men attractive
Me: So CHOOSE to find them attractive
Him: ……. I can’t.
Me: Sorry, WHAT was that? You CAN’T????
we need to get beyond this argument that being gay is not a choice, because guess what? for some people it IS a choice. I do know women that have chosen to be lesbian because they feel safer with women than with men (one of these women went through A LOT of trauma as a child). We can argue all day and night that we deserve equal rights because we didn’t choose to be this way, but the real thing is that that shouldn’t matter.
this is AMERICA. you should be able to choose to be in a same sex relationship just as you should be able to choose to be asexual, heterosexual, or single. By stating that its “not a choice” we’ll forever be butting heads with the religious and explaining ourselves forever. the basic fact is, however, that we shouldn’t have to explain ourselves. our personal lives are just that and it doesn’t matter who we love, we just want equal rights. end of story.
amen. biological determinism sucks. my life shouldn’t have to be proven scientifically or any other way. stating that being gay is not a choice will not only lead people to forever question that and try to prove you wrong, but it also excludes tons of people.
as for me, i don’t really care if my loving a woman was nature vs. nurture. i spent a lot of time worrying about this when i was first coming out; I worried that i was being influenced by listening to tegan and sara and the people that i was friends with who were mostly lesbian/queer/trans. i was scared to come out because what if i wasn’t really gay? what if i was just subconsciously becoming gay because of all these other influences? was i really as gay as the girls who figured out that they liked other girls when they were 3 and i didn’t until i was 18? and then i decided “so fucking what” because i shouldn’t have to prove my gayness and why i like girls. saying that people can only be biologically gay ignores and invalidates tons of peoples’ experiences where that may not be the case and makes them feel like that they will never be gay enough or make them forever question whether they have the elusive “gay gene.” it’s stupid. people should be able to do what they want. it IS a choice. we are all autonomous people.
This is huge. Portland is now the third municipality in the country to provide trans-inclusive care to their employees, and Oregon is a clear leader in the national effort to end insurance discrimination against transgender communities.
I’m so happy that Sam Adams is doing something right with his idiotic ass. At least one of our communities is being served and treated equally while the other ones, including people of color, are constantly being pushed out, overlooked, and ignored in a city that screams “diversity” and remains 78% white. Three cheers for trans*-inclusive health care! Three cheers for Portland figuring shit out on the queer front! Three prayers for the people of color in this city…
it’s so good to actually read good news in my dash.
i read the mercury’s coverage of the city council meeting about this awhile ago. i’m also glad it passed. re: the second person who commented, i’m also glad sam adams is doing something halfway decent in the city. now how about low income housing, increased shelters and other social services? oh and paving all those roads out in east portland would be nice, too.
1. this story is pretty ridic in general, although the woman does look like a 14 year old boy.
2. the opening line is ridic offensive. has the writer even seen boys don’t cry? cause i’m pretty sure brandon teena wasn’t just trying to get in the pants of 16 year old girls when he was raped and murdered.